Kiss

Dear Caden,

You thought no one was looking but I saw you. It was ever so quick, the slightest whisper of a kiss on top of Jacob's head, then you scampered off. Your secret's safe with me.

Love,
Mommy

Can I Try Some?

Dear Caden,

For the past week you have watched me feed baby Jacob. You haven't said much, instead just standing to the side watching ever so closely. Tonight you asked me if you could try Jacob's milk. Sorry Caden, its a little bit crowded at the bar. How about some fish sticks instead?

Love,
Mommy

Yacob's Milk

Dear Caden,


You stare at the pump and become wide eyed as milk flows into the bottles. You very wisely conclude that it is "Yacob's milk!" and quickly inform me that Jacob wants chocolate milk. I try to explain to you that I cannot make chocolate milk, but to you that was completely unacceptable and you proceeded to have a meltdown. Even though he is only 9 days old, I am sure that he appreciates you looking out for him, ensuring that he receives only the finer things in life. You are the best big brother.

Love,
Mommy

Crocodile!

Dear Caden,

The past few weeks you have been fascinated with all things crocodiles. You will scream, "COCODILE!" at the top of your lungs and use your little arms saying, "chomp! chomp!" chasing after me and Daddy. When asked if you are hungry or ready to take a bath you will emphatically inform us that, "No! Cocodile hungry time!" and "No! Cocodile bath time!" We are no longer able to kiss a sweet little Caden night night, instead we kiss a crocodile night night. Thank you for informing me that I am no longer mother to a little human. . .at least you are the most adorable crocodile I've ever seen.

Love,
Mommy

Midnight Snacks

Dear Caden,

It all started with the baby gate at the top of the stairs left open overnight. Not the best move on my part. I wake up at 3:30 in the morning with extreme nausea so I decide to go downstairs to make me some chamomile tea. At first I panic as I see you laying on the kitchen floor, not moving. As I race closer I hear a crunch! Crunch! I look down at my bare foot and see a very sticky and very crunched piece of cereal stuck to the bottom. Crunch! I hear a slight sigh and I see you in the middle of the kitchen floor, peacefully sleeping surrounded by mounds of lucky charms drenched in pancake syrup. Apparently your grilled chicken and fruit for dinner wasn't enough to satisfy your hunger. Your choice in a midnight snack makes me nervous of your teenage years to come. Next time can you just come get Mommy first? And could you please not do this right after the floor was mopped?

Love,
Mommy

Happy Mother's Day

Dear Caden,

It is Mother's Day. I sit here, on the cusp of delivering your baby brother any day into this world, and my mind begins to wander. I think of the anticipation, excitement and nervousness in the days right before you arrived two years ago. I remember the long days of bed rest where I had to make up a 'Happy Thought' every day in order to stay positive. You became my ultimate Happy Thought. . . and looking at you now with all of the laughter and chaos you have blessed me with, you have not disappointed. I remember the euphoria of hearing your throaty cry and kissing your soft face for the first time.

At the time I became pregnant with you I had often wondered what type of mother I would be. Would I be one that was laissez-faire, one that would be free and easy going and allow you to do just about anything?  Or would I be crazy strict, militant and expect you to walk the imaginary straight line? I pray that I am a happy mixture of both types. I want you to know that there are rules in this life and that consequences must be paid if you step out of your boundaries, but I also want you to have fun. I want you to be able to laugh easily and be creative. I want you to know that yes, when you make mistakes that you will have to fix them yourself, but that our door will always be open and that you will always have a mommy that loves you no matter what. I want you to excel in life and become the man that God designed for you to be. I want you to be humble, strong, a friend to those that are different. I want you to be you. I want for you to think back on your childhood and not struggle with finding happy memories, but rather struggle to find a favorite happy memory. I am not perfect and there will be days that I may lean to one side more than the other in parenting, but no matter what - know that beyond a shadow of a doubt I adore and love you.

Thank you for making me a mother. Thank you for putting a smile on my face and for driving me absolutely bonkers. Thank you for being my "Stinky Face" and for saving me from those evil 'Piders' in the form of stickers (or the real deal). Thank you for teaching me that spilt milk or pancake syrup on a newly mopped floor isn't the end of the world - just really close to it. Thank you for the slimy, yet absolutely delicious, wet kisses. Thank you for teaching me to stop and take time to rediscover the world and how beautiful it really is, through your eyes. Thank you for being you, for you are simply amazing and breathtaking. You are worth every sleepless night, every tear, every laugh, every sigh of frustration and utter contentment. . .everything.

When Jacob comes I pray that he is just as amazing as you are. I will celebrate each of you for your different talents and for who you are separately. Each of you are Fearfully and Wonderfully made by God and I am blessed beyond measure and my cup runneth over. Be the best big brother you know how to be and show him the ropes of life. Protect him and love him. Share your toys with him and race after bubbles with him. Make forts out of sheets and have camp outs on the bedroom floor. Create masterpieces out of macaroni noodles and mud. Give him a wet willy and run like crazy. . .

As this Mother's Day draws to a close, Daddy and you celebrated me today. However, today we also celebrated you - for it was because of you that I became more than just a girl with a twinkle in her eye. Because of you I was granted to a much higher calling, the calling of Motherhood.

Love,
Mommy

Cheerio Nirvana

Dear Caden,

I happen upon you as you are sitting in the middle of the kitchen floor. Your unending, stretchy fingers have somehow reached the box of cheerios which have become your prized possession. You are elbow deep in the opened box of cheerios, a large grin plastered on your face. Surprisingly you aren't making a mess, instead you are just swimming with your hands and opening and closing them allowing the cheerios to freely pass through. Quick fact : Mommy loves to do the same thing in the bulk raw bean bin at the store. Nirvana.

Love,

Mommy

Bubbles and Mud Pies

Dear Caden,

You know you've had a productive day in the life of toddlerhood when your bath water turns brown after your bath. Lots of memories are made from bubbles and mud pies.

Love,
Mommy

Mommy! This paint stuff is awesome! I look like I attacked a zombie!