Tiger and Lilly

Dear Caden,

Tonight's letter leaves me with a bit of mixed emotions. Today we took our cats, Tiger and Lilly, to their new home with our wonderful friends who so graciously said they would love them for forever. Daddy and I have had Tiger and Lilly longer than you have been alive. Tiger loved playing with you in your playroom and would be Catzilla as you built buildings and drove cars around him. Lilly was always Mommy's cat, my cuddly bug and my comfort on rough days. It became harder and harder for me to keep giving them the love they deserved with my health not always in best shape. Caden, I feel in a sense that I have failed you, or at least robbed you of a great chance at love and endless delight. They were your friends, you would run up to them and just hug them and yell to the ceiling of how much you loved them. Today is a day that I am angry with myself and disappointed that my body isn't what it should be. I am young, yes, but my body is that of a much older person. I am trying my love, I am trying so hard to give this life my best for you, and for Jacob. I promise to take you to visit them and I promise I will show you pictures as their new owners send them to me.

When we dropped them off you didn't even seem to notice. You were too interested in playing with the toys that were around. I was so thankful that you didn't seem to be upset as I was a complete mess inside and if you would've made one peep I would have been bawling. It hit tonight when we put you into bed.
"Mommy? Where Tiger go? At his new house?"
"Yes baby, they are with their new family now and getting love from them and playing over there."
"But Mommy, I love him this much..." (you squish your pointer finger and thumb together really tight) and whisper "It's bigger on the inside."
If you know anything of Dr. Who, then you will understand this reference. This is when I had to step out of the room to 'check on Jacob'. This is when I completely lost it.

Tiger and Lilly, you were amazing. There were times you drove us nuts, like when you tripped me going down the stairs while pregnant. However, all the times that you loved us unconditionally, allowed Caden to pull your tail and talk about your 'bellybutton' and would sit in my lap and love me...those times will never be forgotten. May you find love in your new home, I know they were excited to have you and you are in excellent hands. Just know how much we love you too and how hard this was for me. I miss you guys already. Crazy how little furballs steal your heart when you aren't looking . . .

Love,
Mommy